Thing of the Day: Lent

When I was a wee teen, I thought Josh Hartnett was the hottest thing since sliced bread (I've never really understood that sentiment, actually. What is so hot about sliced bread? Bread is really a rather boring food and if I were a metaphor inventor I would select something considerably hotter, like spinach and goat cheese pizza, or lobster ravioli, or Ben & Jerry's Half Baked in FRO-YO form)--so I obviously also thought that 40 Days and 40 Nights was the most fantastic movie ever created.

Being a wee Jewish teen, I never really understood the concept of Lent. What the f was the point of giving up something that you liked for 40 days? The Lord didn't have a choice, we do. No thanks. But after seeing Josh Hartnett in all his hotness struggle through 40 painful days and nights (what Mr.Hartnett's character gave up was sex, and sexual relations in every way shape and form), I decided if sexy Hollywood movie stars could do it and find the love of their life in the process, damn it, so could I. So with the help of Google (or were we still using Yahoo in 2002?), I discovered that the purpose of Lent was to "give something up and take something on," and more or less followed these guidelines through the rest of high school and into freshman year of college.

As I have become older and somehow, less mature, I have stopped giving things up for Lent. True, there is nothing actually wrong with this, seeing I am Jewish, but after this weekends' celebrations of Mardi Gras in the wonderful New Orleans (beads, booze, Bourbon Street, funnel cake, jambalaya (stolen from strangers at my favorite NOLA bar, Pat O Briens, and carefully picked over for traces of meat. Somehow, I am till a vegetarian, but I may have ingested half a piece of jamalaya sausage by accident this weekend), pizza, Hurricanes, Hand Grenades, and general debauchery), I have decided that if I choose to honor Fat Tuesday quite so, um, vigorously, it is only fair that I give the same respect to Ash Wednesday.

Thus, starting today, and for the next 25 days (I am leaving for spring break in Jamaica (!!!!) on March 6--one does not fail to indulge in anything when on senior year spring break) and then the 8 days after I return from Jamaica, I am giving up dairy, and taking on writing.

Anyone who knows me knows how I feel about dairy. I consider cheese its own food group. I once ate an entire block of goat cheese alone within an hour. I get Bagel Bites/Pizza Rolls as a late snack every time I go out. And I devour those Fage yogurts like its my job. But, for the next 25 days, I will remain dairy-less. This means: No cheese. No frozen yogurt. No ice cream. No chocolate products. I obviously plan on blowing through hundreds of dollars at Whole Foods tonight buying the organic vegan lactose free versions of all of these products, but I can safely say I feel about dairy how Josh Hartnett's character in 40 Days felt about sex.

I'm not sure I can live without it.

As for writing, I plan on writing something every of these 25 days--whether it be a blog post, a story, a journal entry, a poem, or a bunch of random scribbled nonsense. My only guidelines is that it has to be non-academic.

Wish me luck.

And by the way, whatever happened to Josh Hartnett?!